The Changing Landscape

You heard it here first! After a six-year relationship I am calling it quits with my landscaper. He did a great job for the first five years but he has gradually become too comfortable and complacent. Our yard, once the envy of the neighborhood is now barely holding its own at “status quo”. This might be acceptable if we were paying for status quo, but we’re paying “green with envy” monthly maintenance fees. The coconut that broke the Royal Palm Frond, came by way of a $300.00 unapproved up charge for additional palm tree trimming he said was not covered in the monthly fee. This may have been all well and good had he not been so presumptuous in assuming we were willing and able to pay the additional charges. He never gave us the courtesy of telling us in advance. It’s not so much about the $300.00 as it about the fact that he took away our freedom of choice!

The landscape is changed in many ways, mostly as a metaphor for my life.

Six years ago, I would have never had the courage to confront my landscaper. He had all the power, I would have paid the up charge, I would have settled for status quo. But, the landscape HAS changed. Mid Life happened.

So, I tell the landscaper, the economy has changed. {As if he hadn’t noticed.} The “landscape” of the way we do business has changed. It is unacceptable to us that he would just charge us for something we didn’t request. To which he said he would split the difference with us, letting us know that he felt that was a very generous offer on his part.

I don’t know what struck me more, the fact that he charged us or that he had the audacity to let us know he was doing us a favor by splitting the cost. To that I confidently said “at the end of the month your services will no longer be required.”

It was liberating! No longer bound by the insecurities of my youth there is something so incredibly profound about realizing the landscape has changed in more than one way. Mid Life is here dammit and lots of good will come of it!

It’s the time to see your childhood dreams come to fruition, throw caution to the wind and challenge yourself. Getting out of your “comfort zone” had become your comfort zone!

The status quo just doesn’t cut it anymore. Time used to be measured by how expensive my watch was. Today, time is more about “how I spend it” and “who I spend it with” …

Mid Life is about luxury. The “luxury” of knowing who you are, where you’ve been and where you’re headed. It’s not the beginning of the end, but the beginning of the beginning.

New Beginnings … Second Chances

In the amount of time it took me to write this post, my landscaper had a change of heart. Not only did he wave the additional charges, he lowered our maintenance fee by $25.00 a month with a promise to bring back his A game.

Mid Life is about taking a stand, backing it up with fact and purpose. It’s about giving and getting second chances. It’s about moving forward, going places and enjoying the ride, no matter what the vehicle!

Is there "Truth" in Numbers

Scott Stratton a.k.a. @unmarketing wrote a blog "Saran Wrap Series ~ My Transparency On Twitter." It's about automating your Twitter account. It really caught my interest because for some time I had been vacillating about whether or not I should start automating my Twitter account to "beef up my numbers."

For some reason credibility comes along with tens of thousands of followers. As much as I would love to see my "reach" grow swiftly and in record numbers, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. The beauty of Twitter is the sincerity of its users and the ability to really connect with people I otherwise would never have met. Managing my Twitter account is no different than the way I conduct business or the way I make friends IRL. It's all personal. It all has purpose and meaning. In doing so, Twitter has changed my life in so many ways. Opportunity has come tweeting more than once. Had there only been spammers & porn stars in my tweet stream I might have missed some of the remarkable people that have come into my life.

Twitter has taken me around the world, virtually and IRL. Somehow that far outweighs "beefing up my numbers."

The Power of Giving

"The Power of Giving, by Azim Jamal and Harvey McKinnon, is an international bestselling book about how giving can dramatically improve your life. It's packed with inspiring stories and wonderful advice to give your life more meaning."

http://www.thepowerofgiving.org
http://www.thepowerofgiving.org/blog
http://twitter.com/givingbook

When Size Matters

There are many moments when size matters. Like when you go to put on a favorite outfit and it no longer fits. The frustration, the disappointment, the self loathing.

Or you stumble upon a fabulous sale, one of a kind, the very last one~~> oops wrong size. Better luck next time.

Size matters when you are the smallest kid in the class and bullied by the 'big' kids. Size matters in travel, a lot. Just try exceeding the weight limit on luggage and what that will cost you.

Size matters when you order a pizza. Better have enough to go around or it could get ugly.

Size counts in relation to your bank account. Bigger is certainly better.

"Super Sizing" became an instant hit until we realized that there was a down side to having fries with that.

All this thinking about size and numbers came as a result of meeting Chris Brogan at IzeaFest. Chris Brogan is President of New Marketing Labs. He's a speaker, a blogger and the co-author of Trust Agents, with Julien Smith.

Chris Brogan was not what I expected. I expected aloof, hurried and someone more preoccupied with his iphone than the people in the room. I couldn't have been more wrong. Chris was truly engaging, very kind. And funny. I had no idea what a quick wit and great sense of humor he had. He was also very insightful. "Be self aware, not self involved" he said. Having over 100,000 Twitter followers could certainly have gone to his head, but it didn't. I watched closely as he spoke with everyone who approached him. He was in the moment, gave each conversation 100% of his focus. Lesson learned "Don't Judge a Tweeter by his Numbers"

Having "followers" can give you a false sense of self importance at times. Yes, I'm speaking from my own misguided sense of self importance and the value I was beholding to the "number" of Twitter Followers I had. Barely 6,000 pairs of ears in my Twitter stream, but the largest audience I had ever had! But was it enough? What could I do, should I do to grow these "followers" in number. Would the nonsense I spew be of more value if 10,000 or even 100,000 'followers" read it? Then, thinking back to Chris Brogan, it clicked.

It's not the Number of Followers that you have but, the SIZE of your connection. It's about building meaningful relationships. Do I need 10,000 @McMedia devotees to connect? Surely not. I should however, nurture the followers I have. I want a BIG connection. I want to meet the people I tweet with. I want to KNOW them. I care. I want them to know I care. I genuinely like people.

I was standing in the crowd at Izeafest and looked up to hear "Are you @McMedia?" "Hi, I'm DJ Edgerton, @wiltonbound" .... DJ went on to say I was one of he first people to connect with him when he started on Twitter and how much he appreciated it. I was humbled and almost felt shame. Had I even earned his gratitude? It made me realize that how you interact through social media, does matter. It was a BIG reminder that we are talking to real people, commenting on real topics, dealing in real life situations. Be nice, be kind, be thoughtful. Be a friend, gain a follower, build a relationship. Our tweets are the foundation of our relationships in SM or IRL.

Forgive me followers, it has been many months since my last blog post.

Forgive me followers, it has been many months since my last blog post. Funny, how in times of overwhelming stress and worry, I am always thrown back to my Irish Catholic up bringing and thoughts of the priest in little dark box. Memories of the little girl trying to decide what sins she committed, the thought, the fear & dread of the act of confession far worse than anything I had ever done wrong.

I'm not one to dwell on the maudlin, more of a realist and straight shooter. But even for me, my father's failing health, lengthy hospitalization and subsequent life in a nursing home have put me in a tail spin, fighting to find a way to make the best of a bad situation.

I have spent countless hours, days & nights at the nursing home we jokingly refer to as the "Comedy Club". Somehow calling it that has made it bearable. After all, laughter is the best medicine and has been a part of my family as far back as I can remember. We've found humor in the crazy, funny in the unthinkable just to get through it. It gave our family hope, a familiar feeling in a very unfamiliar place.

Our hope has moved over and made way for acceptance. My father isn't getting better and slowly his diseased body is wearing him down. He's coming home next week so we can celebrate the moments. Now, life is all about moments.

We have no idea how much time he has left here on earth but we will fill each of his days with laughter, make every one his moments memorable.

And in his honor, and at his request, I begin my journey to finish the bucket list he couldn't. So join me as I hop in the RV and hit the open road with @rickgriffin and @ocdchick on the "The Mid Life Road Trip".

Eating & Tweeting A Match Made in Heaven

From the moment he opened the door, @barryfrangipane's smile lit up the room brighter than the crystal chandelier he imported from Venice, Italy. I immediately knew we were in for a special evening. Anyone who knows me well, knows how much I enjoy Twitter. It has introduced me to so many fascinating people I would have otherwise never met. That's also what inspired Barry and his wife of 12 years @dolcedebbie to create a Twitter dining experience like no other. I, like everyone else at the Frangipanes's that evening met on Twitter. It was any ones guess how a group of virtual friends connected only by 140 characters, would 'hit it off' IRL (in real life). What happened next would defy odds and reason. Not only was the food, wine and beer incredible, but the interaction of this group, once connected only by keystrokes, resembled that of a group of old friends.

With each new course grew tighter bonds (and waistbands)and stronger threads of friendship. It was a remarkable experience, one I went into with skepticism and trepidations but emerged from with new friends, increased knowledge and a palate that was tantalized and taken to new heights.

The Menu

Appetizers-Fried Rice Ball w Shrimp, Bruschetta, Fried Zucchini Straws
Beer Pairing Lagunitas Czech Style Pilsner
Wine Pairing Bisson Prosseco 2007

First Plate - Parmesean Risotto
Wine Pairing Bonci Verdicchio Carpaneto 2007
Beer Pairing Bell’s Two-Hearted Ale

Second Plate - Pistachio encrusted Sea Bass
Wine Pairing Deforville Chardonnay 2007
Beer Pairing Jolly Pumpkin Brewery Calabaza Blanca

Main dish - Grilled rack of lamb encrusted in parmesean cheese, bread crumbs and rosemary.
Wine Pairing Pievano Sagratino Montefalco 2003
Beer Pairing Dogfish Head Raison E’Etre

Dessert - Lemon Cake with strawberries marinated in Limoncello.

Bananas Exposed

Bananas, are the worlds most popular fruit, with a long history dating back to Malaysia in the 6th century BCE. But, like many of us the Banana is misunderstood. It's a plant not a tree and is actually the world's largest herb!

Bananas are said to have all the nutrients a human needs plus they contain all the 8 amino-acids our body cannot produce itself. The banana "completes" me.

It is not until you peel back the layers though that you discover how much goodness the banana has to offer. Like people. Until you peel back all the complexities that make a person who they are, you never get to the true essence of who they are.

Take the time to get to know someone. Look beyond the skin. It is inside that you will discover the goodness and reap all the benefits.

Art work by Deb Brown
www.debo.com/blog
twitter: @ArteDeb